I’ve been informed recently that my life is terribly unbalanced.  Rarely have truer words about me been spoken (except, maybe, ‘you have amazing hair’ and ‘you’re a wonderful human being’). I admit it.  I have a tendency to focus on a few aspects of my life to the detriment of the rest.  And while I might regret this and hate this about myself, and may be working continuously to rectify it, at least I am self-aware. 

I’ve shared stories about my worst job ever, and while it could have been worse (surely it could have been worse, right?), my anger and fear and frustration at that position masked other, more serious issues that I was then at leisure to ignore.  Because I have no balance.  But as things got better for me, my focus returned to where it should have been all along - on things that needed my attention from the beginning. 

I know I’ve been absent lately.  I know I’ve let people down.  And it kills me.  But as I continue to lead an imperfect, unbalanced life, I have to keep my squirrel-like focus on what needs my immediate attention.  I’m not making excuses, because these are my shortcomings; I’m not saying my life is worse than that of anyone else, because that is far from the truth.  I am insanely blessed in every sense of the word.  I’m just taking the selfish and cowardly way to say I’m sorry for running and hiding and staying away.